I Made 300K Selling my Underwear
Scrolling through TikTok, a young man walks up to a twenty year old woman,
“How much money do you have in your bank account right now?”
She laughs, “Wait.”
Digging into her Chanel bag she pulls out her phone, logs into her banking app,
“Two hundred and thirty thousand?”
The man collapses.
“IN YOUR ACCOUNT?” He gasps, “What are you a drug dealer?”
She laughs, “Actually I sell my used underwear online.”
———- What? Did she say three hundred thousands dollars? The exact amount in child support that I’m owed and I’ve never received?
I watch it again.
Typing, best used underwear online into my google search, my heart races.
There are many sites and I’m clicking through as many as possible, tabs everywhere. I’m a perverted maniac according to my IP address. Immediately, I’m noticing how poorly these used underwear photographs have been taken. Bad angles, bad lighting.
I can do better than this and I need three hundred thousand dollars.
I pull off my pants, look at myself in my underwear and think…
YES
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