Firstly. Nepotism bebes with money, you know not to even bother with any nonsense being thrown at you publicly. So, don’t. Stay chill. Your biggest worry should be deciding on who you partner with in any form. That’s just common sense.
Secondly. I’m no longer afraid of the ramifications of discussing the fact that I am not a nepotism baby, have never received and cannot collect child support because I do not have a 100K retainer for an international lawyer. This world was not built for single mothers and success. Nothing enrages me more than this. I will free-climb then tear down the Burj Khalifa for single income parents out there who may stumble across this page. Please shout yourself out, vent. Have at it in the comment section. It’s yours.
Thirdly, did you know that if you are predisposed to illness, being financially responsible for four people: a child abroad in University and two teens at home - can cause you to get really sick?
Debt can actually give you a stroke.
Coolcoolcool.
My girlfriends who are single with children text me throughout the day, “Who did we kill in a past life?” “I thought this feeling would end, its been six years.” “GOOD MORNING HOW ARE YOU I CREID [sic] TO THE SPECTRUM OPERATOR” Life rafts. Dinghies. Notes in bottles thrown into the ocean.
My ex has financially destroyed me (I’m a Sag but this is not hyperbole.)
This month I’ve made a turn. I’ve stopped believing all of the things he used to tell me: you’re stupid, you can’t do this, you’ve always been a failure, ask your dad.
But I know the truth.
I’ve raised three children for six years completely alone- no weekends with dad, two visits a year- all he does.
I made a movie that was reviewed well and was given SXSW’s opening night premiere- directly after Judd Apatow’s film.
There was a lot of excitement. SXSW program and PR coordinators mentioned how they’d given the same enthusiasm for for Booksmart.
There were t-shirts and jackets and a major brand putting gear from a movie I made into their stores.
And if Covid hadn’t happened and the sale of my indie had landed post SXSW I would absolutely not be writing this right now.
And to be perfectly honest. Writing this right now feels better than cocaine, so thanks Covid - but just for these moments as I type.
In the name of every fucked up man who makes their children’s lives difficult - please subscribe and follow me this year while I unpack life in 2023.
I’m like a collection bucket.
Pass me around.
Share.
Delight.
I’m really happy you’re here.
That isn’t bullshit. Algorithms work, we are orbiting.
I’m lucky, I’m so lucky, I’m lucky.
And if any of you nepo bebe’s want to spread the joy, I’m here to take your grandparents money. I heard they were hot. Also? I’m 100% with you and I was dead serious about the only thing you need to be concerned with.
Locking further newsletters for paid subscribers only because I’m going to publish essays this year and they will inevitably piss a few people off.
We can light the night on fire with words, baby.
For the record, I'll delete anything about my ex in these comments.
Please leave a note otherwise <3
My Ex-Wife likes to get as close as possible to the 180 day limit that constitutes child abandonment in my State. If she hits 180 days of no contact with our son I get a lot more rights. So she goes 178, 179 days and shows back up.
It's aggravating because when I try to do something about it, I just get weird looks. There is no fraternity of single fathers and people treat me like a freak for being the primary, and really only parent in his life.
I've put career ambitions aside. How can I climb when I alone have to miss every day he's too sick for school? When I have to leave while the men I work with act like their children are accessories for their wives to raise, how do I keep up?
I feel unfit to be anywhere. These career men make me sick with their cavalier attitude towards their role in the lives of their children. I also feel unwelcome in most circles. The assumption is always that I, as the man, caused my situation. I didn't. I fell for the wrong one. My ambitions were in every way destroyed for it.
I wouldn't take them back now, though. Not if it cost me one second with my son. Worth it. Totally worth it.