The First Hookup After A Breakup

December 2021

I took a beta blocker thirty minutes ago for a penis.

I can't forget I took the beta blocker.

Two drinks on a blocker sends me to sandbag, bodybag, and paperweight—bodystoned, which I cannot have.

I took a beta blocker because I'd only seen one penis in the previous three years. Frankly, I'm never sure how to react when I encounter a new penis. It feels like opening a birthday present in front of the gift giver. I don't want to look, but I want to look, desperately. Please don't make me look. But I need to. I want to.

The car he sent for me is driving down the mountain, past the Canyon Country Store. He texts, “I’m at the table. Some friends are here.”

A funny, handsome, older actor/writer with a high Tomatometer score got to L.A. today and contacted me by phone.

“Do you want to meet at Chateau for dinner and hang at 7?”

The call for an impromptu dinner/hookup was not forecast, but he is close enough to my house to say yes.