The Modern Proposal: A Study in Sanctioned Waiting
A woman can become a CEO, run for President, or travel to space. But she still has to wait for a man to decide if she gets to be a wife.
She'll be told she's too eager if she brings up marriage, too desperate if she wants a timeline, and too demanding if she has standards. She'll watch him prioritize his career, his personal growth, his mother's opinion – all while she waits. Then one day, after years of investing in his journey of "finding himself," she might watch him propose to his second wife within months of meeting her.
From prom to proposal to divorce, we've normalized a system where women perfect the art of waiting while men perfect the art of keeping them waiting.
Not everyone wants marriage. This isn't about pushing traditional life paths or suggesting marriage as an ultimate goal. Many choose different, equally valid ways to build their lives and relationships. But for those who do want marriage, we need to talk about the profound power imbalance in how that choice unfolds. Because even in 2025, even among the most progressive couples, the decision of when still rests almost entirely with men.