The Perpetual Playlist

high school hallway power walk

I was pretty indifferent about high school. The classes were okay, except chemistry. I hated chemistry. When people ask, I didn’t have that one great teacher to reference. I wasn’t popular but wasn’t bullied. Truly, indifferent.

My basic memories include:

  1. Flirting with boys.

  2. A few of my worst high-school decisions.

The worst thing I did when I was fifteen was introduce a shy fifteen-year-old friend to an older boy whose locker was beside mine. A week later she told me they’d kissed. I thought I was the greatest matchmaker in the world. Two months later she told me she was pregnant. I thought I was the devil reincarnated. 

The worst thing I did when I was sixteen was get alcohol poisoning the first time I drank alcohol. I threw up McDonald’s fries in the backseat of my friend’s boyfriend’s dad’s car. I tried to throw it out the window and ended up throwing it onto the back of the passenger side seat and the closed window. It was the boyfriend’s dad’s car and it was the boyfriend’s dad’s birthday.

The worst thing I did when I was seventeen was buy a fake ID to get a job checking IDs at a rave club. I did it so I could dance in public every weekend. It was a great time for electronic music and observing weird people that did not go to my high school. I ended up missing sixty-four days of school that year. At the end of the year I crossed the stage in my cap and gown and they gave me a piece of paper in the diploma holder. It was a fake diploma, they warned me they wouldn’t give me a diploma but assured me it would look like a diploma and I was like, okay. So I guess I really don’t even know if I graduated high school.*

Off the top of my head, these are the things I can recall today. Indifference and bad moves.
What I really needed was this playlist. It would have given me dramatic purpose as I walked the hallways of Strathcona Composite High School.

Instead, today I listened to this mix of music as I drove the 134 freeway. In a future newsletter I will express my disdain for this freeway, but today, I was the most powerful and confident driver the 134 has ever supported on its asphalt. I hope it does the same for you, whether you’re in a hallway or on the freeway.



*I did attend five universities, colleges, and tech schools. I graduated from one of them. We will discuss the mental health of a young woman who drops out of four post-secondary institutions in another newsletter.